Rose Mary, Principal, Orchids – The International School, Manjri, Pune

Rose Mary is a Dynamic leader, reflective practitioner and a motivator. Passionate to be in the Education Industry with a panoramic experience of about 19 years. She has two Master degrees, M.A in English and M.A in Public Administration. She has the privilege of knowing a foreign language too. She has learnt French language from Alliance Franchise, Delhi. She is a graduate of Jesus and Mary College, Delhi.  To enhance her educational skills and to have an edge she has a B.ED degree as well. Worked in India and abroad.  In India she worked in various branches of Delhi Public School and abroad she worked in Malaysia and Ministry of Education, Maldives. She has won Awards and Laurels for the excellence in service.  Also worked in Denvarsity as Chief Operating Officer (COO).  With deep rooted commitment to education, she believes to inspire her students and teachers through motivational and inspirational workshops.

 

Nowadays, the school has become the first stepping stone in the life of a child, wherein he/she learns a lot more than just rote learning. Developing hobbies, refining them, learning basic etiquette, getting skilled at multi-tasking, and developing social skills are some of the many things that a school equips a child with.

Speaking about the role of overprotective parents in students’ social awkwardness, as the word suggests, there is an immediate negative connotation by the prefix “over”. It implies that protectiveness is exaggerated, and anything overdone can have adverse effects. Overprotective or helicopter parents want to ensure that their children will not be physically or emotionally hurt. They want to protect their children from harm, pain, unhappiness, negative experiences, rejection, failure, and disappointments. 

As for the effect of overprotection on the well-being of the child, studies have shown that overprotective parenting can lead to risk aversion, a dependency on the parents, a higher risk of psychological disorders, and a lack of strong coping mechanisms, and chronic anxiety. A child that is not allowed to take risks or make his or her own choices is bound to face a lot of anxiety and trouble when having to face the harsh realities of a chaotic world.

That’s why they often build a golden cage for their children; it keeps them safe from harm, but it is a cage nonetheless. As a result, later on in adulthood, these children may be reluctant to spread their wings and fly. When these children become adults, they still have to face the “cruel world” but lack the life skills to effectively do so, because they were kept within a glass bowl all along. 

Following are the challenges for teachers dealing with social awkward student’s parents:-

  • Pouncing on a teacher seemingly from the moment an assignment is given.
  • Micro-analyzing every grade that goes home. 
  • Looking constantly for signs of progress or struggle. 
  • Showing far more concern about the student’s work than the student does. 
  • How a parent responds to a child having interpersonal issues is vital to the child’s success in overcoming them, and how the child continues to relate to others moving forward.

Here are some ways to manage your overprotective parents: 

  • Pre-frame parents in parent talks with tips for navigating interpersonal situations that children may face. The great thing is that when you hold parent talks, overprotective parents usually turn up. 
  • Tell parents to resist the temptation to rescue their children from every bad thing that happens to them. That isn’t remotely close to how the world works and could disable their child in the long run. 
  • Parents need to know that there is often more to the story. This is especially true if the account is given at night when things tend to become distorted. 
  • Encourage parents to have a moderate response, as opposed to underreacting or overreacting, when their child comes to them with an issue. They also need to refrain from projecting their own feelings onto their child. 
  • As a school, the model for your parents the use of specific and accurate language to describe interpersonal dynamics. For example, instead of allowing the phrase, ‘the child is violent’ or ‘is a bully, it is better to say the child displayed aggressive or bullying behaviour. 

It can be difficult to manage overprotective parents in order to help the child. Success lies in having a process that encourages parents to guide their child through a problem at school in a supportive way, without reacting or going into anguish themselves. Rather than attempt to spare the child from suffering, encourage parents to trust that what has emerged could contain important learning and to support the school’s efforts so that we are all working together.

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